Jeremy buys yarn

    The last ten days since the previous post have been quite the wild ride here in the "Mel" household.  As a result, I have only been able to accomplish one quest, and Jeremy has managed to crochet three rows, but those are stories for later.  Today, I bring you the not-quite-captivating tale of one husband, one wife, three children, and a point and shoot camera on video mode, set loose upon the super-duper-mega-monster craft store's yarn aisle.  Between the camera and the yarn fondling, it's a wonder we didn't get tossed out.

    The super-duper-mega-monster craft store was amazingly empty when we went. Good news for Jeremy. No one had to witness his ultimate discomfort of standing in the yarn aisle. Well, not entirely true. He has spent many hours in yarn, craft, and art stores, usually wearing a blank expression, looking the part of the beleaguered husband who has found his happy place inside his head.  However, this time, he had to actually participate in the choosing of color and yarn type. After all, it is his scarf he's making. 

   Most likely, Jeremy figured he'd walk in, grab the first skein off the rack, in whatever color he thought was manly enough, and walk out.  I wasn't about to make it that easy.

     "You plan on wearing this, right?" I asked as he held up the hunter green acrylic yarn.
     "Maybe," He said.
     "Then you should feel it, not just look at it. If it's scratchy, you won't like working with it, and you won't enjoy wearing it."
     "Oh-kaaaay..." he said as he rubbed the yarn on his face.  Not exactly what I had in mind when I said "You should feel the yarn", but I wasn't going to say anything more. I had the camera in my hand, and watched as he rubbed the yarn on Joshua, Ruth, and Hannah's faces.  Taking a unanimous decision that the hunter green was, indeed, 'too scratchy' he proceeded to pick up another skein.  "I like this color. How about this color? And look it's soft. Now can we go?"
     "No. You need a hook."
     "What's a hook?"
     "The thing you use to crochet with. It helps pull loops through loops. Let me see the yarn. It will tell us what size hook. I like to go up a size or two when I make a basic no-pattern scarf so it's more open and has more drape."
      "Bwah bwah bwah bwah bwah bwah." Jeremy said, imitating Charlie Brown's teacher.
      "Here." I said handing him the correct hook.
      "It's PINK!" he said. "I can't use a pink hook!"
      "It's red, " I said. "It's not pink."
      "I want a different color." He said.
       "They don't have that size in a different color. Each size has its own color. You won't be any less manly with a RED hook than a silver or blue hook."
      "I really don't want pink." He reiterated.
       "It's already a size larger than recommended. You'd have to go up to yet another size to have a different color than RED."
       "It's Pink. Isn't that pink, Josh?"
       "Yes. It's pink." Josh said, in the never ending quest to defend masculinity for all man-kind.
       I groaned. "It. is. NOT. Pink. But fine. here. Have this hook." I took the next size up off the rack.
       "That's better," Jeremy said. And we wandered to the check-out. The camera continued filming, and I'm sure the check-out clerk thought we were quite batty.  But then again, this is the family that drives through the city wearing multi-colored wigs.

So, come along to the super-duper-mega-monster craft store with us, and maybe afterward, the soundtrack will loop continuously in your head as badly as it is stuck in mine.